Hey guys! Long time no see. I have no reason for not writing since long. I could, but I didn’t, just that. Anyway, today’s post is about putting yourself out there.
Well, most of the time when I used to evaluate certain situations all by myself, it used to end this way “I am the only one thinking this way (any particular way), feeling this, or going through this, nobody else thinks about it this way, why am I the only one going through this and people are enjoying their lives, why me?” I mean we all have this question “why me?”.
Quite recently I have started being candid with people- telling exactly what I am feeling, what my opinions are on a specific topic, displaying my immediate reaction unbiased by the people around me- with no expectations whatsoever. By doing this I have realized, that people connected with me in a better way when I put myself out there, rather than keep in my mind. Plus, the more I shared with people, the more they were willing to open up; and while this happened, I understood that I am not the only one feeling this way, thinking this way, etc. Most of the people out there are going through the same, but they don’t display, probably assuming the same what I was assuming. The moment I decided to be out there and show exactly who I am, the more like-minded people I found, and the world just seemed better again. In the end, I wondered what was I afraid of? I concluded that there is nothing lo lose by being yourself.
So fellas, don’t keep it in your heart. Be out there, not in your mind. Losing anybody doesn’t matter as much as losing yourself does. Be true to yourself.
A lot many times I’ve felt a voice inside me wanting to be heard, wanting me to just become silent for a moment and listen, because it is answering the question I’ve been asking. Also, a lot many times I’ve ignored it. Simply because it held no reason. And let me tell you, I’ve always, like always encountered problems by going against it. On the other hand, whenever I’ve followed it, even though how irrational it may have appeared, the situation got solved almost instantly.
I see this voice as a guiding force within me, a higher power which is guiding me through its only way of communication, me. Many call this intuition, a gut feeling, and many as their own angel. Well whatever I name it, it fulfils its purpose. It guides me, protects me, outwits me.
I have come to believe that not everything has to be rational to be believed, not everything has to be visible to be seen, and not every answer has to be out there. All I have to do is to come at peace with it and be silent within, so that I am able to listen to it and see through its eyes what I can’t see by my own.
There are times I doubt when a person says”I love you”, and sometimes even if I accept, I question “how much?”, wondering if it’s more or less than I do. But today, I question myself if the expression itself is not enough for me. Isn’t the simplicity and mere acceptance of a feeling not good enough? Is there any evidence for Love? Does love need a measure? Does it has any? I suppose not. Neither can I prove love, nor can I tell how much; because it’s a feeling beyond measure. Either I do, Or I don’t. That’s all.
For quite long a time, I had a list of things I wanted to have, do or be so as to experience happiness, true and immense happiness. Very recently, I did get one of them, and the moment I scratched it off the list I remembered something else that would make me happy. I was too quick to add that up to my list. It was then that I realised that these things are just my idea of happiness; my happiness is attached to the strings of these things and as long as I keep them attached, I won’t find happiness ever, because if one reason goes, another comes up just as quickly.
I pondered for a moment if that scratched point actually made me happy. I feel immense joy when a kid holds my hand to support him while walking, a similar feeling when my pet runs up to me when I reach home. I also get happy when I see my mother preparing the dish I wanted to eat since long and didn’t tell her. But I could compare none of these feelings with what I felt after scratching that point.
Isn’t life full of these small little things that make you smile from ear to ear? Don’t they make you feel alive all over again? I don’t need a list of things that “will” make me happy; because tomorrow is just as uncertain as certain today is. Finding happiness in this very moment is in my hands and I resolve to live it, live it completely.
How deeply I understand the fact that nothing lasts forever, that everything is temporary. Yet, I imitate a beautiful present moment in the future too, wanting this moment to be there too and give me as much happiness as it is giving me now, if not more. Just a sudden distraction and I come back to now, realising that I have to live in this moment and seize it, if I want to feel this happiness in the future too. Because ultimately, it’s not the moment I’ll carry with me in the future, but it’s the happiness it has caused me now, that i can carry with myself wherever I go.